After analyzing 10,000+ comments, I think I know why talking to AI about depression feels so dead.

Hey everyone,

For the last 6 months, I’ve been down a rabbit hole. As a dev, I got obsessed with a question: why does talking to an AI about mental health usually feel so… empty?

I ended up scraping 250+ Reddit threads and digging through over 10,000 comments. The pattern was heartbreakingly clear.

ChatGPT came up 79 times, but the praise was always followed by a “but.” This quote from one user summed it up perfectly:

“ChatGPT can explain quantum physics, but when I had a panic attack, it gave me bullet points. I didn’t need a manual – I needed someone who understood I was scared.”

It seems to boil down to three things:

1. Amnesia. The AI has no memory. You can tell it you’re depressed, and the next day it’s a completely blank slate.
2. It hears words, not feelings. It understands the dictionary definition of “sad,” but completely misses the subtext. It can’t tell the difference between “I’m fine” and “I’m fine.”
3. It’s one-size-fits-all. A 22-year-old student gets the same canned advice as a 45-year-old parent.

What shocked me is that people weren’t asking for AI to have emotions. They just wanted it to understand and remember theirs. The word “understanding” appeared 54 times. “Memory” came up 34 times.

Think about the difference:

• Typical AI: “I can’t stick to my goals.” -> “Here are 5 evidence-based strategies for goal-setting…”
• What users seem to want: “I can’t stick to my goals.” -> “This is the third time this month you’ve brought this up. I remember you said this struggle got worse after your job change. Before we talk strategies, how are you actually feeling about yourself right now?”

The second one feels like a relationship. It’s not about being smarter; it’s about being more aware.

This whole project has me wondering if this is a problem other people feel too.

So, I wanted to ask you guys:

• Have you ever felt truly “understood” by an AI? What was different about it?
• If an AI could remember one thing about your emotional state to be more helpful, what would it be?